recession post recession......:(

Probably this is one of those incidents of my life that can never be forgotten, it is so well etched in my mind. I was not staying late in office and pink slips (a fashionable term used to describe being kicked out of your job - well I think so) were flying all over, the colleagues in office had this big scared look on their face, no one knew who would be on the chopping board next. It did not make much difference to me then coz living off peanuts for a salary did not matter to me, as much as others with families etc.

I was with Manish (boyfriend of 4 years - turned husband) at Lawrence and Mayo checking his eyesight when I get this call from my friend Shuchi, it was about 7 in the evening and we were at their Cannaught Place branch. She said " hello Chetna ho gaya", "kya ho gaya" I asked in the hope of hearing something else but she persisted and got angrier while telling me "wahi yaar - lay off", god did my world come down though I was not too depressed but the words did not make me any happy either, probably I just did not want that tag on me, it did not sink in initially though we as a team were preparing ourselves that it might befall us anytime, but actually happening to us was something none of us dreamed of nor wanted, probably it is more regal to leave an organization than being asked to leave it. Another thing hurting me was that it was my first organization and if you are planning to have a career (successful one, I am yet to come across anyone working to make an unsuccessful career) then being laid off from first job itself is not too delighting or so I thought. Anyways!! Manish came out post his eye check and I informed him or may be he guessed "the news" seeing my ever expressive (or should I say over expressive) face. Whatever he said to me after that made sense but it made me feel ok, the thing that was eating on my brains was how would I face my dad, of various varieties of parents, my set belongs to the category who first find fault with their progeny and then with the world outside, so I might be ok with the thing but my parents or rather my dad would not be ok, it wud hurt him to know that I was not good enough in office and so they threw me out, that is how I think all parents working for government offices think, and that is exactly what makes them appreciate their job, because it comes with a security unheard of in our private jobs.

Time seemed to fly extra fast and I reached home, I entered and informed my mom, "nikaal diya office se", I said, she was surprised and dad happened to come into the living room just then (I was having an exceptionally (un) lucky day it seems) and she immediately told dad about it, meaning I got no warm up period I was looking for with dad, loss 1, dad began with "isliye office mein achche se kaam karna chahiye", I tried to cry but tears were just not coming, (tears have their way of showing up at times you dont need them really) in my mind I was not responsible for the lay off and so was not feeling sad, probably shaken but also aware that I could have done nothing to avoid it.......in fact I slept well that night,,,,,,,and for dad I think after my successful stints at bigger organizations, trips to US, high paying job and rewards he does not even remember (though I do) that his youngest daughter was laid off in her first job, not until I remind him of that....and then I can expect to hear that "is office mein achche se kaam karo.....".......parents to parents hain.....hehehehe

typical day in life of a tester first time testing- leading :)

Job of a lead is never easy whether he is development lead or testing lead, and the toughest task is to put a pretty face and smile even when you are itching to hit the person in front of you. My day starts early, a quick connections of my laptop later, i check through mails, planned out a few things in between running to the kitchen to make tea, nothing refreshes me like a big cup of tea really. I called my manager and discussed my plan for the day. Then quickly disbursed the plan to the team and rushed to office (as if they would be there before me to start executing the plan, naive as I like to be sometimes)


The team was there alright, with one or two faces missing (did i say this is customary esp on delivery days), I was almost driven to the verge of hitting it out, today was delivery day and everyone is supposed to be in by decent time on top of that, the fact that they did not bother to inform the lead further boiled my blood.The PM has this habit of dropping by when I am most unprepared and he lived upto his reputation by walking into our cube, "so is everybody in" he asks "yessss....almost" I muttered, not sure and hoping he does ask me the names/count, which he did a couple of seconds later. Having walked in few minutes back myself i was not sure of my team members whereabouts and so it definitely was a tough one to answer. Thanks to his blackberry which came to my rescue, an imporant call needed his attention and he left.



I used the time, gathered my nerves, reminding myself that it wont work if I get angry with the team, I calmed down and tried to find out what kept the couple of guys away. Then realizing (that is the option to choose when you have no choice) that profession and personal emergencies can occur at any time for anyone, I decided to focus on whoever was present (probably learnt to look at positive side of things), after looking over their shoulder to see they were indeed executing like i wanted them to i settled into my own, things i thought looked up.


A visit to PM cube, "how does it look, can we meet deadline" he asks? "it looks good" i replied, probably the words fell out before I had time to reflect on them, happens when u r a lead for first time leading a team of 10 testers, i forgive myself ?(all the time :)) but he advised which i will never forget that "it is important that it looks good in the evening/at end of day and not in the morning" amen to that, i thought



By evening his words stung me time and again, the spirits had sagged and all did not look as flowery several environment problems later we were through with only 50% of test cases of what was targeted for the day. Leads call was half an hour away and even asking the team after every 5 minutes if the test cases were moving did not change the numbers drastically, at last I gave up and went in..i was greeted by my PM with a question mark on his face.....he somehow manages to show on his face what he is thinking and the look did not do anything to make me feel any better :(......the meeting went by,,,,,,,with PM's rescuing me when he could.

recession created testers, which were not to be..

I passed out of college in a year which most people would dread to get out in, it was a year of recession for IT industry, not seen before. It was 2002 and my college placement cell could do nothing to find us a job. The other detriment was being part of the first batch passing out of this college no one had heard the name of this college which made the task of getting a job wee more difficult. Also telling anyone my college name had to be followed up with more info on the college as 10 out of 10 people would ask "where is it?" accompanied with a does-it-even-exist look on the face which got really annoying at times (of some things college goers hate “someone not knowing their college” tops the list).
For me it was a rough patch, I had always thought of myself as being capable and for a freshman who is ready to embark upon a new journey post college, it did not seem a good start at all...
I did not discuss the situation with my parents much, lest I showed signs of a realization of having chosen the wrong field. Though they were convinced already thanks to my bold move of shifting from home science into computer engineering which saw very few takers in my family 3 years back, except myself no one was with me when I made a 180 degree shift by choosing to do my masters in computer applications post a bachelors in home science (must have been out of my mind really)
Not knowing what to do initially I went into my shell, literally also as I was seen outside my room lesser number of times than the usual. Talking to friends depressed me, so I avoided them too. On the whole I was kind of living in another world coz I did not know whom to get angry with no one around seemed responsible to take out my anger on, it was just a situation and something out of my control. (it is only sometimes, I take to such rational thinking, normally I would shout a few times, upset a handful of people and then do the thinking) But I was keeping faith and had the belief that “I CAN DO IT” and even if no one from my batch was not to get a job, I would, I have always been a go getter.
Then I realized I had to help myself, none else could, none in my family belonged to IT background, I had to pull it myself and that is what made me more determined to reach my goal. Different people tackle problems in different ways, I took a less treaded path(at least in my eyes-none from my class of 40 did it the same way i did). Every morning I would get up early (only then getting up early was easy-probably i was not getting any sleep) in morning, take a bath and eat breakfast to avoid all distractions until lunch time. Then as soon as dad left for office I would sit on the desktop myself to search for IT companies on google. I would then call them to speak to the HR personnel there. The first half of their office hours seemed a better choice to me, in the hope of finding them in a good mood. Sometimes on hearing that a freshman is on other side of phone, my greetings would be responded with the hung up tune from other end, it definitely was disheartening.


Dad was with me at that time, sticking to me like any dad would at a testing time for his children. Seeing the determination in my eyes every morning turning into disappointment at end of day he suggested I pay some money and do internship somewhere. But thankfully after repeated calls and pleads and couple of written tests later I got internship with a firm to much relief of my parents but they only had positions in testing much to my chagrin. I anyhow settled for what I was getting, and yes 75% of people from my batch were not placed. Probably that period of recession was responsible for my first tryst with testing, which has since stuck to me and I can say “I AM AN ENGINEER– forced into testing” L and proudly add “I am loving it” J